Deep Dark Sad Place

I am sure I am not alone. At least that is what I have to keep telling myself. I am in such a deep dark place and I feel all alone. I don't really know what to do. I would post this to face book but I would have every do-gooder trying to fix my problem. Every facebook shrink trying to diagnose me. I just can't take it. They also would be wanting to take me to an in patient facility. I am not going to hurt myself. I am not going to hurt my kids. I am just really really sad.

I have never suffered from post-partum depression and I don't believe that is what this is. It is just plain old, run of the mill depression. The part that really sucks is the fact that after each of my babies has been born I have had my support system ripped away from me. This time I had hopes that because I was going to a place we had been before, this would not be the case. It is. I am all alone. To make matters worse, I am not allowed to drive. I have been driving but I an really not allowed to do so. I have made two friends here. One just had major surgery and the other, she is busy with her own life but she has made it a point to drive me around when I have needed it. I appreciate that but it doesn't help the way I feel. I hate having to ask. I wish the support system that I thought I had in my church family would realize that I am alive. I have not had one person call and offer to take me to lunch or Walmart or anything. It kinda makes me want to find another church, but it is not limited to my church or neighborhood. It is everywhere. We are so busy that we don't notice need.

Well I just needed to get this off my chest. I would love to just go in my room and cry but that is not my style. Maybe I will do it anyway.

So it has been forever since I posted anything on this silly blog. My life has changed so much. I am now living in San Antonio and we have a new addition since my last post. Aaron is now officially a teenager. Asher is 10. Abigail is almost 5 and the littlest addition is Annalise Victoria. She was born on August 3, 2010. She fits right into my chaos.




Last month I had 2 seizures that they believe is related to the pregnancy. I am not allowed to drive for 6 months from the date of my last seizure. It is a pain but I am trying to figure it all out. More to follow.....

Poop Happens

I just wanted to thank MeMarieLane. I really appreciated the blog that you posted about poop titled Everything you never wanted to know about poop. It came in handy and I am forever thankful however the recipient is probably not so much happy. If you are looking to send a gift of poo, go to Poopsenders. Again, Thank you.

First Day of School Woo Hoo!!!!!!

Boys went off to school this morning. Summer is over!!!!

More of the same

This is today's effort. It is a 0-3 month size. I made it with cotton and pink tule. It is like a baby ballerina dress. The Blue one from yesterday is a newborn size. That one was silk dupioni. It may be a bit rich for a newborn dress but oh well.

Crafty Me

So I have had the crafting bug lately. I have been a busy bee.

Home from the hospital

I was discharged from the hospital at 11am today. I am in a good deal of pain but not completely unbearable. I am sure it will pass in a few days. I only get clear liquids for the next 2 days and that sucks. I want something to chew. Oh well. It is the price of beauty.I will post some pics later.